What Is Self-Image
According to Maxwell Maltz in his ground breaking book “Psycho-Cybernetics”, Self-Image is the sub-conscious framework, of how we see life and ourselves. Everyone has one and most of us are not even aware of it, and that’s a problem. It means we may have powerful beliefs about ourselves and the world, that we can’t challenge or change because we’re not even aware of them.
There are things that influence us and how we present ourselves to the world, that we are totally unaware of. A lot of people have an internal dialogue, that sounds like this.
- This is “less than” and “less than” is good enough for me.
- I can’t do that.
- I will never achieve what I think that person has.
- I don’t deserve what they have.
- I know I’m getting cheated, but nice is what I’m supposed to be, I’ll be nice rather than complain.
- I don’t have leadership qualities.
The things that we fixedly believe about ourselves are often negative and we don’t even realize it. We create our environment based on these false narratives. We script a life with certain income, certain relationships, and a certain lifestyle, based on these internal narratives. Although consciously we say we want more, we’re very uncomfortable about taking any steps toward change.
Others Hold Your Beliefs
Amazingly we often opt for a job or lifestyle that is admittedly unfulfilling, rather than an unfamiliar alternative. This is compounded if people in your life are working off your script as well. Any behavior or decision that goes off script can make them feel threatened and anxious.
Maxwell Maltz in his book “Psycho-Cybernetics”, goes into detail how our self-image is the fundamental and outcome determination element of our life experience. That it develops and occurs both passively and unconsciously. This self-image is strengthened and reinforced by the choices we make in life, and how we express them. These choices are made with no appreciation to the gravity of what’s really going on.
Self-Image Affects Everything
The face we present to the world is based on this self-image. These self-generated characteristics are presented to the world in every action we take and are reflected in everything that happens. Every success or failure, every result in terms love, money, achievement, recognition peace or harmony, flows from our self-image.
Opinions Are Not Facts
According to Maltz we complicate our difficulties by confusing facts with opinion. We not only add our opinion to any fact but we put as much weight of our opinion as to the facts. Our self-image is the key to our personality and behaviors, it sets the perimeter of what we do in any situation. The types of personalities display the same behaviors, positive vs. negative, happy vs. sad, healthy vs. sickly, strong vs. weak, young vs. old, successful vs. unsuccessful and winner vs. loser.
Maltz spelled failure as:
- F) Frustration with the inability to accept reality
- A) Aggressiveness due to the frustration
- I) Insecurity or an inner feeling of inadequacy
- L) Loneliness through a lack of oneness, poor social skills
- U) Uncertainty, trying to avoid making mistakes or taking responsibility
- R) Resentment due to perceived victimization
- E) Emptiness no creativity, no goals
We have to de-hypnotize ourselves and nothing has meaning unless we give it meaning. You can start doing this by performing the following:
- Be aware of your thinking and behaviors
- Reprogram your unconscious through visualization daily
- Be too big to be threatened
- Don’t take yourself so serious
- Accept that making mistakes is how we learn
- Stop criticizing ourselves and others
- Improvise more
- Stop scripting yourself
Maltz spelled success as:
- S) Sense of direction
- U) Understanding of others
- C) Courage to make mistakes
- C) Charity for the feelings of others
- E) Esteem for one’s self
- S) Self-Confidence by remembering our successes
- S) Self-Acceptanace of where you are right now
What’s Holding You Back?
It’s our self-image that keeps us from living the life of our dreams. Experts agree that it’s never too late to change and to recognize what is holding us back. We need to create a new plan for living, NOW. We need to stop living a life of routine existence, NOW. If playing it safe has become our only purpose, we have lost our passion. A life with no passion, is no life. It ages you prematurely. Don’t accept mediocrity. We were blessed with a creative imagination and a goal seeking mechanism called the mind. We are not our mind, we have a mind, we use it, to create the world we desire and believe we deserve.
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As always, thanks for visiting.. Dave