Narcissistic Personality Disorder; The Bondage of Self

Narcissistic Personality Disorder; The Bondage of Self

The Major Reason Behind Addiction

Having recovered from Alcoholism it’s my belief that Narcissistic Personality Disorder is the major reason for Addiction today. It is only when the addiction gets so bad, that treatment is demanded by family,work or the law, that the addict learns that the addiction is only a symptom of grave psychological problems.

No One Thinks They Have It

To quote the Mayo Clinic, “People with narcissistic personality disorder may not want to think that anything could be wrong, so they may be unlikely to seek treatment. If they do seek treatment, it’s more likely to be for symptoms of depression, drug or alcohol use”

Everybody Thinks It’s the Addiction

As I stated above, everyone comes in through the back door, it’s the addiction that drives them into treatment. For the few this treatment is with a Psychotherapist or an expensive stay at a Rehab, 30, 60, or 90 days or longer. For the majority the treatment consists of AA or NA, especially if they are court ordered.

Has To Be the Addicts Idea

The Mayo Clinic goes on to say,” But perceived insults to self-esteem may make it difficult to accept and follow through with treatment.” This is especially true if it’s their first experience getting sober. If they are being forced into treatment they will only do the minimum required, if that, then quit. It’s only after it becomes the addicts idea, to get sober, that they will even attempt it for real.

Once Your Sober You Realise

By real I mean stay in a program long enough to physically get sober, and become willing to attempt a program of recovery, most programs utilize the 12-step format developed by Bill Wilson and AA in the 1930s. It’s through working the program, that one comes to understand, that the addiction is only a symptom, to grave psychological problems.

Tell Them They Suffer From NPD

It’s at this point that instead of talking in generalities about higher powers, victimization and resentments the program would really benefit if they would just explain what they mean by the term,” bondage of self”. It’s my opinion that another name for the bondage of self could be Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

It Started Early

Although the cause of narcissistic personality disorder isn’t known, some researchers think that in biologically vulnerable children, parenting styles that are overprotective or neglectful may have an impact. Genetics and neurobiology also may play a role in development of narcissistic personality disorder.

It’s About Your Beliefs

How you developed the dis-empowering beliefs systems, as a child, is really secondary to understanding how these belief systems are manifesting themselves in your life. What beliefs are really holding you in bondage? It’s the dichotomy of holding the belief in your subconscious and consciously trying to deny it that makes a person miserable, wanting to self medicate.

Beliefs Cause Behaviors

Signs and symptoms of narcissistic personality disorder and the severity of symptoms vary, depending on the beliefs held. People with the disorder can:

  • Have an exaggerated sense of self-importance
  • Have a sense of entitlement and require constant, excessive admiration
  • Expect to be recognized as superior even without achievements that warrant it
  • Exaggerate achievements and talents
  • Be preoccupied with fantasies about success, power, brilliance, beauty or the perfect mate
  • Believe they are superior and can only associate with equally special people
  • Monopolize conversations and belittle or look down on people they perceive as inferior
  • Expect special favors and unquestioning compliance with their expectations
  • Take advantage of others to get what they want
  • Have an inability or unwillingness to recognize the needs and feelings of others
  • Be envious of others and believe others envy them
  • Behave in an arrogant or haughty manner, coming across as conceited, boastful and pretentious
  • Insist on having the best of everything — for instance, the best car or office

At the same time, people with narcissistic personality disorder have trouble handling anything they perceive as criticism, and they can:

  • Become impatient or angry when they don’t receive special treatment
  • Have significant interpersonal problems and easily feel slighted
  • React with rage or contempt and try to belittle the other person to make themselves appear superior
  • Have difficulty regulating emotions and behavior
  • Experience major problems dealing with stress and adapting to change
  • Feel depressed and moody because they fall short of perfection
  • Have secret feelings of insecurity, shame, vulnerability and humiliation

 Functioning Addict?

Wikipedia had this to say about NPD “according to the DSM-5: “Many highly successful individuals display personality traits that might be considered narcissistic. Only when these traits are inflexible, maladaptive, and persisting and cause significant functional impairment or subjective distress do they constitute narcissistic personality disorder.”[6] Due to the high-functionality associated with narcissism, some people may not view it as an impairment in their lives.[12] Although overconfidence tends to make individuals with NPD ambitious, it does not necessarily lead to success and high achievement professionally. These individuals may be unwilling to compete or may refuse to take any risks in order to avoid appearing like a failure.[6][7] In addition, their inability to tolerate setbacks, disagreements, or criticism, along with lack of empathy, make it difficult for such individuals to work cooperatively with others or to maintain long-term professional relationships with superiors and colleagues.[13]  

Feeling of Irritability and Discontent

It’s when these behaviors, cause significant impairment and subjective distress, to such a level, that a person will start looking for or accidentally finds, something that changes the way they feel. These “things” obviously vary and can take the form of food, sex, gambling etc. but most people find relief through drugs and alcohol.

It’s Through the Addiction That Recovery is Possible

Fortunately it’s through the abuse of the “medication” that drives a person into treatment, where they find out, if they are lucky, that their addiction is actually a symptom. Once they understand this, the real recovery can begin.

As always, thanks for visiting. Dave

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